Wednesday, December 1, 2010

all about the birds and the bees

It's funny about the crusing life, the things you learn, the things you wished you didn't have to learn.
Like someone said ,"well at least you don't have to mow the lawn" well... if you haven't cleaned the bottom of your boat in a while, it is scarry what you find growing there. If you scrap it yourself, it kind of feels like mowing the lawn in a kind of aquatic sort of way. if thats too wet for you well then you can tend to the tidying of the decks, wrapping up the sheets (ropes) kind of like the hoses off the lawn, then watering the lawn, I mean the deck to wash all the dibree and salt off the wood. and the satisfied wife after its all done, just like when the lawn is freashly cut. Pride then the cerimonial beer. Except in Mexico you probably have one going since noon.What has this all got to do with bees you ask.
I was hoping youd ask. I ssems that a small colony of bees living under the sail cover,don't like the sail cover moved when you are cleaning the decks. We have some expertise here, though techically it's with wasps and they were Canadian. These bees were, well, mexican and short honey bees 2/3 the size of there northen cousins.
All my years of experiance tought me 2 things, wait till it's dark and let someone else to pull the trigger. It does not sit too well being a pacifist, vegetarian, don't hurt the animals sort of guy, and then your seen killing bees in a masacure.There could be female bees in there with  babies. So, I got Nikita to do it! He knew the old man doesn't have the stomach for it. He opened the sail cover sprayed RAID, they all died fell onto the deck end of story. Next day we are putting up the fore sail, the one we took down in May so it would not look tatered like the one in Mazatlan harbour, left out one season too long. Things go smooth as the sail reaches the top of the mast, I'm on the haulyard, the rope feels funny, thicker and waxy. About 2 feet of the halyard is in wax. I look up to the top of the mast and a swarm of bees are buzzing the topof the mast head, with the odd one diving to the deck. We all run aft and down below. What the....
Well that turns out to be my entertainment for the next few days, I go to the Halyard, a different one, the one that really makes them pissed off. now the mast is about 50 ft tall and by the time they figure out what the hell is going on, Im at the back of the boat. Then there was this one time they came after me I thought I got away as I turned around this one lone bee does a kamakazi on me and hits me right between the eyes. It hardly hurt,a 2 out of 10. just a bit itchy. next day a little puffy, next day very puffy,on the bridge of the nose. Next day my under the eyes are fat, por puffy, yet droppy just like an old man.this gave me a long time to think. We need a plan.
We will send Nikita up the mast,at night of coarse, with a garbge bag, cover the mast head, poke a hole in the bag and gas the bast...Except that he is my first born, what if they swarm, and that girl by the pool, he would never forgive me.
Plan B the mexican on the dock says they make smoke on deck with news papers vacumn up the smoke and send it up the mast briliant! though a fire on deck did sound risky. Ran this past our nieghbour (Moondance, what a nice couple) Doug says thats how they put them to sleep, the bee keepers that is, it does not kill them.
Plan C We are going to spray RAID into the vaumn and force it up the inside of the mast. but what if the spray doesn't reach the top ,50 ft you know.
Kim says something so stupid, Why don't you tape the can of Raid to the halyard. Man! Women!. the more I thought about it the more I could see it working.
Plan D   tape the can to the halyard that goes into the back pully, only the bottom half of the can so the top can rise over the pully. Tape the can so that when it stops at the pully it is pointing right into the mast head, instead of flapping around. we taped on a band of duct tape over the nozzle and wraped it in the spraying position. Up went the can 3 seconds flat, acually it was only a half a can. It locked in perfectly and sprayed into the mast head for over 2 minetes . a coulpe of bees cam out and started falling. the foam built up and started dripping on us so we moved to the bow. Soon it was all over, then Nikita notices bees crawling out of the bottom of the mast ,stunned and soaked, what to do? he finishes them off with our second can of Raid next day we counted over 100 dead bees on the deck.
Us humans can be so crule, and thats why I don't eat bees
GYPSYWIND on standby just waiting for something else to happen
a good sailor is always prepared